I don't go home too much...

I know that many of yall think that I go home to much. And yall voice it very often. Well, I'm too nice to confront yall to yall's faces, so I'm going to just address it over a blog. 

I'm sick and tired of everyone telling me I go home too much. Even if it was true, you don't have to tell me every single day. 

Just stop. 

I have a life at home and a life at college. I can't just drop my home life for everything in Nacogdoches. I can't. I'm proud of you if you can, but I don't have that capability. I have a life that I really care about back home. I love being around my family. We're a very close family. We watch all the same TV shows, we play cards together, and we're one of those families that sits down and eats a meal all at the same time. I don't like going without that. 

I love my friends back home. I've known them my whole life. We're all really close. They are my backbone. I need them. 

I have things that I still need to do there. I had to work the rodeo a few weeks back, I had to help my grandpa with his election. Those things that mean a whole lot more to me than this college. I would never let my friends and family back home down. Never. They are my life. 

Now don't get me wrong. I love each and every one of yall up here in Nacogdoches, but you need to understand that I haven't even known yall a year and I've known all the people in Van Vleck for 18 years. It's a big difference. 

I know you may think that I'll never be able to move on if I'm home every weekend. Well, I really don't plan on moving on. I plan on getting my degree ASAP and moving back down there. So, there really is no reason for me to even try to really move on. 

Now for the people who tell me that I'm not going to find a man if I keep going back home, and that if I just stayed in Nac more I'd find someone. That's just (excuse my french) bullshit. God has a man in the works for me. I will find him when I find him, it doesn't have anything to do with where I am. 

Let me set yall straight about something else while I'm on this soap box. I'm not a party girl. I don't like going out to wild parties. When I party and socialize I like to hang out with a few close friends and have a good time. I don't like to get drunk and wander home at a really late hour and then not remember what I did in the morning. Don't get mad when I don't want to go out. It's not me. I like to stay in my dorm and watch movies. I like to play board games. I like to just chill and not have to get all dressed up. That's me. 

So, if you think I go home to much. Good. Talk about it amongst yourself, just don't tell me anymore. I will probably start going off on people. The truth is I probably do go home "too much", but that's who I am. I'm a home girl. That's why I came to a college that's close enough for me to go home. I would have gone to Brazosport but I just didn't. I thought I was ready to move on. I've learned differently. And now that I'm here I'm going to stick it out and not give up. And I'm going to do it my way, not the way you think I should. 

Just to see you smile

...I'd do anything that you wanted me to...

^My favorite Tim McGraw song...that I'm listening to now^

I had a horrible dream. Not going to write the whole thing, but it involved my family and a friend's parents and a guy with a gun shooting everyone but Trevor and me. It was crazy scary and I was really scared to walk down the hallway to the bathroom after I woke up. 

Speaking up waking up...I slept from 3:30 PM to 1:30 AM...it was great. Allison said that I rolled over and said a few things to her, but I really don't remember them. Then I went back to sleep about 2:30 and woke back up for real at 10:45 when Allison got back from class. So, I'll probably be up for a very long time. 

I'm tired of guys. I'm not looking for a relationship anymore. I'm just going to have a fun time in life and not worry about it. It takes up too much time in my life and just makes me sad. So, now it's time for HAPPY JORDAN...not caring about boys. YAY!

:) well...I'm off to my dorm to do math homework before math class at 3.

Starting to feel the repercussions...

Pulling an all-nighter sounds so much fun, and mature, and like the cool thing to do right up until the next day when you are trying to handle three strenuous classes back to back. That is just about the point when you are ready to fall down right where you stand and hope to God that nobody steps on you. 

If you didn't read my last blog, I have no been up since 10:30 AM yesterday. Yes, it seemed like a smart idea at the time, but now I am really not liking my decision. 

In some ways it was good. I got my whole room cleaned. I got my laundry done. I finished my essay. I read a chapter in my mass communications book. I made a huge collage of all my new york pictures. I even rearranged a few pics on my wall. 

So, I guess in the long run it was a good idea, because I usually never have time to do any of those things. 

I guess putting off sleep for one night is just what I'm going to have to do every now and again. 

But as of right now (sitting outside the classroom for my last class of the day) I feel like if I closed my eyes I wouldn't wake up until about noon tomorrow. Which is probably exactly what I'll do when I get back to my room about 3:20. I hope nobody has any plans for me this evening because I will NOT be budging. Not one inch. I will love and cherish my bed for a very long time. 

Ok, now time for class. 

Learning! Yay!

Not So Good At This All-Nighter Thing

...I really want to go to sleep. I love sleep. So why did I decide to pull an all-nighter? I'm not sure. I guess because I wanted to clean my room, write my essay, read a chapter in my COM 101 book, and make a collage of all my New York pictures in one night. Maybe it's just because I'm an idiot. I'm not exactly sure. But here I am, 4:31 AM, done with my essay and cleaning my room. Now all I need to do is read and then waste some time until I have to leave for my 7AM meeting. I'm going to be really tired tomorrow, but I just figured I would push through it until 3 and then I could nap as long as I wanted to. 

I'm really looking forward to Friday. Going to my first Astro's game of the year, and it's with my best friend. Jeryca's dad won tickets at work and asked Jeryca if she wanted them and of course my best friend is very thoughtful and loves me to death, so she got them for me. :) It's going to be great. Section 133, Row 4, Seats 5 and 6. It's going to be like the rodeo...only baseball instead of bull riding...and without the awesome Rascal Flatts part. But Brad will be there, so it will be great. Go to my Myspace or Facebook next week for awesome pics of that day. 

Saturday is the One Act Play competition. I don't know how I feel about it. I know I will probably cry because I miss acting so much, but I'm just going to have to suck it up. I'm really looking forward to actually getting to sit and watch all the plays though. Plus I get to see all my friends from the other schools. 

It's going to be a great weekend. :)

But I still have to get through this week.

Tuesday: Classes, sleep, homework, more sleep.  

Wednesday: Work in Welcome Center, class, Bible study, sleep. 

Thursday: Classes, sleep. 

Friday: Drive home...

Then you know the rest. 

Guess I should stop blogging and start reading. 

Maybe I can pull my hair up

So I had a great night. We went to the tattoo place with Alex so she could get her first tattoo and it was taking a super long time. So we went to Raising Canes and got chicken, which is always great. There were four of us packed into my three seater truck (Jeryca, Allison, Maire, and Me) while we were driving and when we had to stop at a red light there was a cop in the parking lot next to us. We all freak out because we just knew that we were going to get in trouble for having too many people in my truck. I told everyone not to make any sudden movements because I figured that if the cop wasn't already watching, he wouldn't notice anything. Well Allison told Marie to just lay in my lap and Marie says, "Maybe I can just pull my hair up". She meant that she would look like a guy giving me a blow-j...but that made no sense. So, it made us all giggle for a very long time. We were all pretty sure that we were going to pee our pants. Luckily we didn't. 

Then we went to Jenna's, watched friends, and had a blast. 

Now we're home and going to sleep. 

Love my life. 

The Songs of My Life

The Favorite:

Free Fallin'-Tom Petty

"Gonna free fall out into nothing, gonna leave this world for a while"

Life Now:

I'm Movin' On-Rascal Flatts

"At last I can see, life has been patiently waiting for me"

Dancing Song:

Tambourine- Eve

"Pop dem bottles and drink that up"

My Daddy Songs:

Ready, Set, Don't Go-Billy Ray and Miley Ray Cyrus

"She's got dreams too big for this town and she needs to give em a shot"

My Little Girl-Tim McGraw

"You're beautiful baby from the outside in"

Butterfly Kisses-Bob Carlisle

"There's two things in life I know for sure, she was sent here from heaven and she's daddy's little girl"

Cinderella-Steven Curtis Chapman

"There's a ball at the castle and I've been invited and I need to practice my dancing"

My Mommy Songs:

Somebody's Hero-Jamie O'Neal

"Given all her life to her was her life's ambition"

Don't Forget to Remember Me-Carrie Underwood

"18 years have come and gone, for momma they flew by, but for me they drug on and on"

Wind Beneath My Wings-Bette Midler

"Did you ever know that you're my hero, and everything I'd like to be"

Brother and Sister Song:

Me and My Gang-Rascal Flatts

"It's a brother and a sister kinda thing, raise up your hands if you all wanna hang with me and my gang"

When I just want to cry:

Tonight I Wanna Cry-Keith Urban

"Alone in the house again tonight"

Helped me through a lot:

Pieces-Rascal Flatts

"To some degree I still regret my memory for keeping you around"

Heartbreak:

It Would Be You-Gary Allan

"It's hard describing a heartache, oh cuz it's a one of a kind thing"

Best Lyrics Ever:

Hotel California-The Eagles

"You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave"

Rap Song Must Have:

Watch My Shoes-3 Deep

"Do what cha do, just watch my shoes"

Songs to sing:

Son Of A Preacher Man-Dusty Springfield

"Being good isn't always easy, no matter how hard I try"

Respect-Aretha Franklin

"What you want, baby I got it"

Upgrade U-Beyonce'

"I can do for you what Martin did for the people, ran by the men but the women keep the tempo"

Best Two Stepping Song:

Neon Moon-Brooks and Dunn

"If you lose your one and only there's always room here for the lonely"

Can always take me back:

Everybody-Backstreet Boys

"Oh my God we're back again"

From The Bottom Of My Broken Heart-Britney Spears

"You were my real love, I never knew love till there was you"

Spice Up Your Life-Spice Girls

"People of the world, Spice up your life"

When I want to remember him: (This one has a lot)

Don't Break My Heart Again-Pat Green

"You can let your heart go, but I will hunt ya down"

Brokenheartsville-Joe Nichols

"He wore that cowboy hat to cover up his horns"

Everclear-Roger Creager

"I took her home and rang the doorbell, left her layin in the yard"

What Hurts The Most-Rascal Flatts

"What hurts the most is being so close and having so much to say and watching you walk away"

Better Now-Rascal Flatts

"If I had one call to make I would dial yesterday and warn myself"

Where Were You-Clay Walker

"I used to wake up nights callin' out your name and cry myself back to sleep knowing I'd only dreamed"

Lot Or Leavin' Left To Do-Dierks Bentley

"These old boots still got a lotta ground they ain't covered yet"

Rodeo-Garth Brooks

"She'd give half of Texas just to change the way he feels"

Yesterday's Rain-Gary Allan

"Sometimes I think about the touch of your skin, the taste of your lips and it all comes rushing back again"

You Can't Make A Heart Love Somebody-George Strait

"You can't make a heart love somebody, you can tell it what to do, but it won't listen at all"

Something I Never Had-Lindsay Lohan

"Were they wasted words and did they mean a thing"

Others that I just love:

Autobiography-Ashlee Simpson

"You want my history, what others tell you won't be true"

Cyclone-Baby Bash

"She moves her body like a cyclone"

Copacabana-Barry Manilow

"Her name was Lola, she was a show girl with yellow feathers in her hair and her dress cut down to there"

More to come, but I just realized that it's 3 AM and I have to drive back to Nac in the morning!!!

Spring break so far...

We went camping.
We=Me, Jeryca, Rene', Kevin, Dago, and Justin.
It was cold and I could barely breathe the whole time. I probably shouldn't have been outside in the cold in my condition, but it was a lot of fun.
Just did some camping things, ate camping food, and came back smelling like a camp fire.
Other than that I haven't done much this Spring Break.
But, tomorrow Jeryca and I are going to see RASCAL FLATTS at the Rodeo.It's going to be amazing. Completely great.
I can't wait.

Tonight is Pie Night. Dago and Justin wanted to make pies, so we are.

I love spring break.

I'm moving on

Why do people insist on being so confusing? Just tell people like it is and move on with your life, it's so much easier.
If you hate me, say so.
If you love me, tell me.
If you want me to stop talking to you, come out with it already.
I'm not going to sit around trying to kiss your butt and make you happy. I have a life to live too.
I want to be happy just as much as you do. I want to be loved. I want to be wanted.
I may love you and want you to be my friend, but this needs to end. I'm afraid I'm going to lose you as a friend, but right now that's a risk I'm willing to take.

To lie or not to lie

Have you ever been stuck in a situation where you know that telling the truth would be better, but a lie would just make it easier for the time being? Well I'm stuck in that very situation right now. I know that the truth should be told, and I know that the truth will be found out eventually no matter what, but no matter what I tell myself, lying just seems like the better idea. If I were tell the truth right now I would lose a friendship. I don't really want to lose this friendship because it means a lot to me, but people do change I suppose. I should just accept that we've changed and just can't see eye to eye right now, but it's just so difficult. 

(If you need to know about the specific situation you probably already do, if you don't, just pretend this is hypothetical.)

I'm just so confused. 

So, this weekend has been fun. The only downside was that I didn't get to see Jeryca. Big Bummer. 

Thursday night I met my family and Kevin, Rene', Justin, and Dago at Pizza Hut/Wing Street and had a great chow down. Then we came back to my house and watched LOST. After LOST my friends and I decided it would be great to go outside and do fun "outside" things...at night. Mainly we just jumped on the trampoline and sat on the trampoline talking and singing. Basically a whole lot of fun. Then we came back inside and played Ghost in the Graveyard. If you've never played, everyone hides in the dark and one person, blindfolded, has to find people. My room is small to begin with, but mom's scrapbook stuff is now in the way, so it was a very interesting game, but still tons of fun. They ended up leaving pretty late, but it was all good. 

Then Friday I was rudely awoken by Trevor asking if I'd moved his Palm Pilot into the bathroom. After telling him that I hadn't (and Rene' hadn't, and Kevin hadn't, and Dago hadn't, and Justin hadn't) he ran out of my room. Did I mention that that was at 6:15??? Yeah...so then I was about to go back to sleep when mom decided to come in and tell me that I needed to talk to her and Tif before they left for school. Talked to them for a while, then cozied up back into my bed for about an hour, then dad woke me up to see if I was going with mom to her OAP thing, when I told him that I wasn't, he let me sleep...but not for long. Justin was awake and ready to text, I received 4 by 9:30 and decided that there was no way that I was going to get anymore sleep so I rose from my unpeaceful slumber. I got ready for the day, showered, dressed, and such then laid on the couch and fell back to sleep until about 2 when I decided that I should maybe do more with my life. Not sure what I did with the rest of my time, but at about 6 Rene' came and picked me up to go to Justin's. Mainly we played spoons and Ghosts in the Graveyard again and left Justin's early because I had to wake up at 6:15 the next morning. 

Saturday I worked the Fair with my mom from 7:15 to around noon and then came to my house, napped, and got ready to hang with my friends again. Rene', Justin, Dago, and I went to Chilis to see Kevin and eat dinner and then came back to my house where we played Catch Phrase and Loaded Questions and did other kick butt stuff like we always do. 

This weekend has made me remember how much I love my friends and how much I really do miss them when I'm in Nac. 

I'm so happy that I'm going to be home so much this month!!!

I just found out that I'm not going back to Nac until Tuesday night or Wednesday morning because my Papaw asked me to help him work the polls on Tuesday morning. 

If you live in Brazoria County vote for Gene Reynolds!!!!